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  So I got my licence today

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  Visited my years old grandfather s cottage didn t know he got a huge bald eagle

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  I don t always talk to girls I like

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  Oh look even pigs have more fun than I do

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  Yeah man I make pepperoni dicks all day

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  The most tactful way I ve seen to deter hotel theft

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  Witnessed a Lion King moment while on a hike

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  So this smells like napalm in the morning

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  I m proving her right every time

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  To those few women who do this