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  Yeah man I make pepperoni dicks all day

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  I don t remember this Arthur book

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  I like my pasta at a m

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  I m proving her right every time

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  Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flu

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  So I let the guy who opened the door for me skip ahead in line and he does this

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  I wish this scene was in the movie

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  The most tactful way I ve seen to deter hotel theft

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  Oh and then I laughed like an idiot

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  flowers everywhere