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  I like my pasta at a m

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  My girlfriend has been away When she comes back I imagine it will look like this

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  Visited my years old grandfather s cottage didn t know he got a huge bald eagle

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  I was sweating bullets

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  Sums up my entire philosophy on relationships

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  The most tactful way I ve seen to deter hotel theft

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  I m a year old guy After years of forever alone two things I never thought I d see

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  I think some teenagers need to learn this

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  I don t always talk to girls I like

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  Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flu